Fathers...I need help!

My oldest is getting married in three weeks. I try to consider what will be remembered 10 years from now and take the long perspective. You have the opportunity to train a husband by not treating him like a boy. I asked my future son in law if he was prepared to be responsible for her.
 
Be glad he's coming to you instead of them just running off to elope. Listen patiently, don't say anything unless he asks a question and let him speak his piece.

After he's done, then ask him a few questions about his plans, can he support her, etc.

If he's the kind of kid you'd like for a son in law, invite him into the family and thank him for coming to you.

If he's not the kind of kid you'd like in your family, borrow the piston mentioned in post #19 and hit him upside the head with it.

He's a good kid, he seems to have a plan and I guess my biggest question is what's the plan? In my mind they are way to young, but they have been together now for over 4 years. My mom and dad were married straight from school and it lasted over 40 years.

I want to thank everyone who gave me advise. I will try to let everyone know the out come tomorrow. I'm going out on the river today!
 
It could be worse.....
it could be ME :wow::grin:

J/K

if the young man has the class to ask your permission first he is probably an ok guy
 
Gofirstclass said:
If he's not the kind of kid you'd like in your family, borrow the piston mentioned in post #19 and hit him upside the head with it.
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GFC,

I think Jonathan meant "pistol". At the end he says something about it being only a pellet gun........
 
Oh damn and here I was thinking I spelt it right and saying to myself. Why would you go after him with a piston? Ha and again I'm not the smartest
 
And hey if it is just to ask for your daughters hand. And your not ready just tell him what my gf. Father told me. If you wana get engaged go for it but im not financialy ready to pay for the wedding. That being said the engagment should last 2 3 years and by then they wil be a little more mature and some more time under there belt with each other. If there still together and decide to do it in that time frame then good for them. Did that make sense? Btw I didn't ask her father he came out of the blue with that comment at dinner one night jyst me and him. We also have a very good relationship together (me and her father) but again wish ya the best
 
Well at least he is traditional and is going to ask your permission, so that sounds good. My question would be is she ready for military life? She has to realize that at a drop of a hat he could be gone for a couple of years. He is U.S. property now and she has no say over that. Some folks don't adapt to military life very well.
 
True story.
My brother inlaw married my sister when she was just 18. He had grade 10 education and had just joined the navy. He was not well accepted by the family but the navy felt he was OK they sent him back to school and he landed up a major. When he retired he became VP of a large company. When he bacame an officer his status changed and when he became a VP he was the pride of all. The navy made him what he became. There were times they were not happy with it but it was the best thing that happened to him. He is now retired and all is well. A positive attitude was what made him. His favorate saying is "We will make it work".
Good Luck
 
northern said:
True story.
My brother inlaw married my sister when she was just 18. He had grade 10 education and had just joined the navy. He was not well accepted by the family but the navy felt he was OK they sent him back to school and he landed up a major. When he retired he became VP of a large company. When he bacame an officer his status changed and when he became a VP he was the pride of all. The navy made him what he became. There were times they were not happy with it but it was the best thing that happened to him. He is now retired and all is well. A positive attitude was what made him. His favorate saying is "We will make it work".
Good Luck
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"We will make it work", I like that attitude. On marriage...when I was young my Dad gave me this advice..."marriage is like a team of horses, when they pull together they can get a lot done".
 
He sounds straight up, as others have said. Also as others have said, in the end they're in control, not you, and they're giving you a chance to be part of their lives. (Whether it's a marriage or a baby, same situation). Swallow hard, be a man, they do get older and go their own way, sad but true.
Even if it is a failure in the long run, which is bad, you stay a part of her back-up.
You can say whether you approve or not, you can say you think they should wait a little, like a year, that's fine, as long as you also say "but I'm with you". Sometimes then they decide to wait a little. Because they're scared too. You sound like a good dad, good luck.
 
Paladin said:
He sounds straight up, as others have said. Also as others have said, in the end they're in control, not you, and they're giving you a chance to be part of their lives. (Whether it's a marriage or a baby, same situation). Swallow hard, be a man, they do get older and go their own way, sad but true.
Even if it is a failure in the long run, which is bad, you stay a part of her back-up.
You can say whether you approve or not, you can say you think they should wait a little, like a year, that's fine, as long as you also say "but I'm with you". Sometimes then they decide to wait a little. Because they're scared too. You sound like a good dad, good luck.
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What he said!:thumbsup:
 
I may need you ;) the meeting is in a couple of hours then on to WM for the anchor rode....I'm leaving the gun at home temptation is a bad thing.
 
dwna1a said:
I may need you ;) the meeting is in a couple of hours then on to WM for the anchor rode....I'm leaving the gun at home temptation is a bad thing.
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Good Luck ! :thumbsup:
 
Xplicitlnck said:
Hey I've gone that route before lol I put a piston to my little sisters x head for raising his hands to her. She came home with a bruised arm once and it never happened again. But that was a little extreme. It was a pellet gun but he never noticed and nobody ever saw him again and he never told her what I did otherwise she probably would have been pretty upset with me. But like I said up above take the right measures for the situation. Give your wife the keys to your arms tho. No jail time needed. I'm young to so I can still tell you us kids will still be kids.
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He, your sister here!! What have you done! I'll get you first time I see you ;)
 
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