Dumbest S!** I ever heard

I was helping someone with a computer problem and I told them to right-click on the icon. Her response was "I can't right-click, I'm left-handed". I had to walk away.
 
quality time said:
All expense paid covered slip at my marina next winter!
Click to expand...

Who-hoo!!!

Is it one of the slips with the covers way up in the air or one of the slips with the cover resting on top of the boats below?



Gary, I’m starting to understand why you do it.
Posting stuff like this is somewhat fun.
 
Outdives are fine in salt water...no problem
 
Fox 5 (New York)’s anchor Ernie Anastos:

"It takes a tough man to make a tender forecast."

weather forecaster Nick Gregory: "I guess that’s me."

Anasotos: "Keep f---ing that chicken!"

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PdnXYWSa56w[/youtube]
 
I'll just list a few from CSR that come to mind...

1. I wait for my impellers to fail before I replace them
2. It's OK to cross the Gulf Stream in a bow rider
3. I installed a "marine" 120v plug in my gas engine room
4. Wifi signals are hard to get on a boat at the dock because of the rocking motion
5. I don't change the oil every year in my boat because the dealer is ripping me off
6. If your toilet is plugged, just plug the vent on the holding tank and hook it to the pump out
7. I don't need a VHF radio because I have a cell phone
8. I don't allow anyone to poop in my boat's toilet
9. Starboard makes a great swim platform
10. My boat gets the best MPG just above planing speed
11. I don't wear a PFD because I can swim to shore
12. I put my portable Honda right next to the front hatch
13. My antenna looks cool leaning back 45 degrees
14. It's OK to run WOT all day
15. You should get on a roof 30 feet in the air over ice cold water and clear snow during a blizzard with 50 mph winds
16. Velcro should be used in quality marine electronics installations
17. I've never had a problem with my Sea Ray Navigator
18. PC's are cheaper than Macs
19. The water never freezes in NJ
20. Rooster, donkey, and horse noises in boating videos
21. I broke a guy's private mooring ball I used without his permission. Do I have to pay for it?
22. Go up that creek and make a hard turn to starboard as soon as the tree limbs touch the bridge

and my favorite....

23. You deserve to have a stalker
 
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Here’s a dandy taken from the article on last weekends Blacksburg High School gym roof collapse.


Engineers say the cave in was caused by the weight heavy snow on the roof. “We do believe that it was due to the weight of the snow and the ice that has accumulated. We’ve had snow and ice since the middle of December and it really hasn’t had an opportunity to melt away,” said Jones.
 
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Gary,

That is too many, you are only aloud 10. Kinda like whats his name top 10 list on the late show.:lol:


Four Suns said:
I'll just list a few from CSR that come to mind...

1. I wait for my impellers to fail before I replace them
2. It's OK to cross the Gulf Stream in a bow rider
3. I installed a "marine" 120v plug in my gas engine room
4. Wifi signals are hard to get on a boat at the dock because of the rocking motion
5. I don't change the oil every year in my boat because the dealer is ripping me off
6. If your toilet is plugged, just plug the vent on the holding tank and hook it to the pump out
7. I don't need a VHF radio because I have a cell phone
8. I don't allow anyone to poop in my boat's toilet
9. Starboard makes a great swim platform
10. My boat gets the best MPG just above planing speed
11. I don't wear a PFD because I can swim to shore
12. I put my portable Honda right next to the front hatch
13. My antenna looks cool leaning back 45 degrees
14. It's OK to run WOT all day
15. You should get on a roof 30 feet in the air over ice cold water and clear snow during a blizzard with 50 mph winds
16. Velcro should be used in quality marine electronics installations
17. I've never had a problem with my Sea Ray Navigator
18. PC's are cheaper than Macs
19. The water never freezes in NJ
20. Rooster, donkey, and horse noises in boating videos
21. I broke a guy's private mooring ball I used without his permission. Do I have to pay for it?
22. Go up that creek and make a hard turn to starboard as soon as the tree limbs touch the bridge

and my favorite....

23. You deserve to have a stalker
Click to expand...
 
Too much stupid for only 10.

I think it's possible to come up with 100...

I should add things like

24. Put ice in your holding tank to clean it out.
25. Is $48 too much to spend on a pack of 8 life jackets for guests?
26. How do I bolt a gray sat dish to the rail?
27. You should remove the injectors and fog your diesel engine in the winter
28. Gas engines are good in a 40 foot Sundancer
29. Single engine planing boats will not hit logs in the water because they are "pushed away" by the hull
30. Raise your drives and just push your boat off the sandbar (answer to a person asking what to do if he ran his 40' inboard sundancer aground)
31. It's not fair that some CSR members have more balls than I do
32. It's George Bush's fault
33. Depreciation doesn't really count because it's not real money
34. I got this boat for "free"
35. What vendor did you use to install headlights on your boat?
36. My wife lets me do whatever I want
37. Anything that comes out of a meteorologist's mouth (or over the VHF weather channels)
38. I never use a spring line






etc...
 
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I would have bet my life that this was coming from Gary.
You forgot the Corn oil, Pledge and velcro. Sorry no. 16 clearly states velcro.

Jack
 
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Four Suns said:
I'll just list a few from CSR that come to mind...

1. I wait for my impellers to fail before I replace them
2. It's OK to cross the Gulf Stream in a bow rider
3. I installed a "marine" 120v plug in my gas engine room
4. Wifi signals are hard to get on a boat at the dock because of the rocking motion
5. I don't change the oil every year in my boat because the dealer is ripping me off
6. If your toilet is plugged, just plug the vent on the holding tank and hook it to the pump out
7. I don't need a VHF radio because I have a cell phone
8. I don't allow anyone to poop in my boat's toilet
9. Starboard makes a great swim platform
10. My boat gets the best MPG just above planing speed
11. I don't wear a PFD because I can swim to shore
12. I put my portable Honda right next to the front hatch
13. My antenna looks cool leaning back 45 degrees
14. It's OK to run WOT all day
15. You should get on a roof 30 feet in the air over ice cold water and clear snow during a blizzard with 50 mph winds
16. Velcro should be used in quality marine electronics installations
17. I've never had a problem with my Sea Ray Navigator
18. PC's are cheaper than Macs
19. The water never freezes in NJ
20. Rooster, donkey, and horse noises in boating videos
21. I broke a guy's private mooring ball I used without his permission. Do I have to pay for it?
22. Go up that creek and make a hard turn to starboard as soon as the tree limbs touch the bridge

and my favorite....

23. You deserve to have a stalker
Click to expand...


Gary, you forgot my favorite one.

24. To get under the bridge I get close and 'gun it' so the stern squats and my arch will clear the underside of the bridge.
 
trit21 said:
Gary, you forgot my favorite one.

24. To get under the bridge I get close and 'gun it' so the stern squats and my arch will clear the underside of the bridge.
Click to expand...

That is a good one... forgot about that.

We'll quickly get to 100...
 
I was helping someone with a computer problem and I told them to right-click on the icon. Her response was "I can't right-click, I'm left-handed". I had to walk away.
Click to expand...

:thumbsup: +1 (I got a tee shirt for that one!)
 
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