Dumbest S!** I ever heard

[hack4alivin]

Ok we need to lite’n things up around here, so let’s start a thread on dumbest **** you have ever heard… I start with this one.


On Sunday my wife and I went to the local winery for their annual evening event. Now this winery has events every weekend during the day, and every once in awhile they have evening events on the same day. There is about an hour break in between to clear out, clean up, and setup for the next one. Ok so we are there early waiting at the counter to buy a case of wine (to take home of course, not for the event...Shez I don't drink that much). A couple came up next to us, they where arguing back and forth. He said I can’t drive home now, I’m too drunk, she said let’s just go to the car and wait 15 minutes. He said it is going to take a lot more than 15 minutes, and “shut-up I am trying to do the responsible thing here”. I thought maybe he was going to ask them to call a cab for him, Na I was wrong, he wanted to buy tickets for the evening event as well!


Great idea, too drunk already why not stay another 3 hours and have some more! Dumbest **** I have heard, at least lately.:smt021

 

[HUMPH]

Dumbest S!** I ever heard? "vote for change" :smt009

 

[Jack F]

Oh.. this is going to be good..:grin:

 

[C-SIDE]

Honey, your always in my heart, but someone else is always in my pants :smt043

 

[Scottzzzy]

I had a customer who's home builder told them the water pressure was better in the sink faucets than in the shower head because of gravity. Does that count??

 

[comsnark]

I had a customer who's home builder told them the water pressure was better in the sink faucets than in the shower head because of gravity. Does that count??

Well. . .if the sink is on the first floor, and the shower is on the second. . .that might actually be true! :grin:

 

[rblatter]

At a lock, on our first holiday trip, I met another boater and noticed he was also going to Ottawa, about 100miles. I asked if he had any maps of the river, and he proceeded to show me.... his ESSO (Exxon) road map...

R.Blatter

 

[Jack F]

While taking a picture of a stealth bomber flying over head, my ex brother in-law said Not to waste my time, it’s a stealth bomber. :smt101

 

[CAMELLA]

A friend thought Alaska was an island because the way it's shown on the map.

 

[chuck1]

Don't replace the impeller until it fails(Grin)

 

[thirtydaZe]

Dumbest S!** I ever heard? "vote for change" :smt009

:thumbsup:

 

[Spookeay]

A friend of mine fell and was hurt. I asked her "Where were you hurt" she pointed at the steps she had just fallen down in a whiny voice said "right there".

 

[JediJD]

In a discussion of stimulus dollars going to government, a very well off woman told me we were stupid Republicans and that we didn't give enough stimulus dollars to government...that the system would work a lot better if the government had all the money and jobs...then we wouldn't have anything to worry about.

Similar...

My mother in law, who I actually like...owned a home (paid for), large farm (paid for), earned probably $150k/year, lots of savings. During the Dukakis election told me she was voting for him because he was for "us poor folks" and would take money from the wealthy business people to make her life easier.

 

[HUMPH]

A friend thought Alaska was an island because the way it's shown on the map.

:smt038:smt038:smt038:smt038:smt038:smt038:smt038:smt038:smt038:smt038:smt038:smt038:smt038:smt038

WE HAVE A WINNER!

 

[hack4alivin]

A friend thought Alaska was an island because the way it's shown on the map.

:smt038:smt038:smt038:smt038:smt038:smt038:smt038:smt038:smt038:smt038:smt038:smt038:smt038:smt038

WE HAVE A WINNER!

While taking a picture of a stealth bomber flying over head, my ex brother in-law said Not to waste my time, it’s a stealth bomber. :smt101

I don't know, this one is pretty good as well... But still too early to call.

 

[wish2fish]

Let me beat Gary to this one!

You should go up the on the marina roof and remove the snow!

 

[Jack F]

Oh.. this is going to be good..:grin:

Let me beat Gary to this one!

You should go up the on the marina roof and remove the snow!

DING DING DING...:lol:

 

[hack4alivin]

Let me beat Gary to this one!

You should go up the on the marina roof and remove the snow!

Damn, you just messed up my bet!

 

[Presentation]

Let me beat Gary to this one!

You should go up the on the marina roof and remove the snow!

You F***ed it up. The thread is the “Dumbest S!** I ever heard”


Should be “Just leave the snow up there, it’ll be fine. Oh, and if a roof collapses, just leave the boats under the other roofs that are built exactly the same way, they will be fine too. Don’t listen to the people up nort' who deal with this every year, they are just dumb a$$es.

Damn, you just messed up my bet!

Now you win again. You are welcome.

 

[carterchapman]

Run at WOT all the time (double grin).