Joke Thread.. post 'em if you got 'em

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For years the same 4 guys had always gone on a fishing trip. One year one of them said he couldn’t make it, to many items on the wifes’ list. On the appointed day the remaining 3 of them departed for the fish camp. Upon arrival they discovered the one who had bagged out was there. Sitting in his camp chair, by the campfire sipping his favorite whisky , he welcomed the group. One of the 3 asked, “thought you weren’t coming” the guy in question said, “ well there I was, watching the evening news when my wife walked buy and said follow me, so I did into the bedroom NOTE: she had just finished reading the 50 shades of grey. Arriving in the bedroom she stripped down, hopped on the bed and handed me some ties and said please tie me to the bed, so I did. She then said do whatever you want….so here I am”.
 
A guy goes to the dentist with an abscessed tooth. The woman pulls out a large syringe for the anesthesia but the man says “No way! I hate needles”.
So the dentist starts to prepare the nitrous oxide but again the man stops her saying “I cannot stand having the mask on”…
The dentist then asks if he can take a pill. The man says “Yes” so the dentist gives him two blue pills. After he takes the pills he asks the dentist what the pills were.
The dentist says that they were Viagra tablets. The man says “I didn’t know that Viagra stops pain”.
The dentist replied “They don’t. They will give you something to hold on to when I pull out that tooth “!
 
randmhall said:
Well, you are also saying your chevy can be a truck. sorry, somebody had to say it. Go Ford!
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I would have said that a few years ago but now Ford trucks are behind GM and Ram. There are literally thousands of 2024's being stored in lots around Detroit and now out at Michigan International Speedway because they are being held for either missing parts or quality issues. I'm really happy with my GMC.
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Jus Cruisin said:
I would have said that a few years ago but now Ford trucks are behind GM and Ram. There are literally thousands of 2024's being stored in lots around Detroit and now out at Michigan International Speedway because they are being held for either missing parts or quality issues. I'm really happy with my GMC. View attachment 161938
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I just can’t get past the square wheel wells.

I learned not to put a round peg in a square hole in kindergarten!
 
Jus Cruisin said:
I tried to get the Masters tickets (any day) through their lottery every year I was in Florida. Nuthin...
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We live in Augusta. I gave up trying to get tickets. We have never won the lottery. The only way I go now is if a friend has a ticket they will not be using. I did work at it one year. That got me in.
 
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