Oh man, that's a rough one. I never understood why people would go the RV route over cruising on a boat. My wife rolls her eyes at me when I talk about moving to Florida and getting a 60' cruiser with diesels. But, when I decide to pull the trigger, she will be right by my side.

Good luck, Shawn. I feel for you.

 

Happy wife, happy life....?

 

Maybe an airstrip in your future?

 

I’m a boat guy as well. And no where near retirement but I say try the rv thing for awhile. There are a ton of places to see in the US and you may love it once you get into it. Plus I’d love to own that Cobalt you won’t want to leave sitting unused while your driving around the country

 

Ya know.... I have a note stuck on my computer to remind me that you have an interest in the Cobalt. Someday soon we need to talk and determine if we are even close on numbers. You may want the boat but not bad enough to pay me what I feel it’s worth. We can PM phone numbers if you want to chat.
Shawn

 

Is there a compromise in there? Maybe, “I’ll do the RV thing for 2 years, but then I want to take 2 years and do some cruising”?? My wife wanted to do the RV thing after seeing some friends do it, but I told her about the great loop, where you get to visit a different city every few days, and now she is on board with that, as long as we truly visit these places, and not just sleep, eat, boat to next marina, eat, drink, repeat...

 

Ugh. You moved across country to be closer to MIL, and now 50 miles is too far..... Seems like something else is going on there. In any case a compromise may be in order. My wife, for example, has no interest in boating, but encourages me to spend time on my boat as often as possible. You just may need to change your boating style to single-handing.

 

We're kind of in the same boat (pardon the pun). One of my life dreams was to take my 330 Sundancer back to the Great Lakes and spend a summer cruising. When we bought our current boat I had to give up that dream but started planning a 4-month cruise up into Puget Sound and Canadian waters. We couldn't leave before this time because her mother, at 104 years of age, is going down hill health wise. We may not be able to make the trip this summer. It all depends on my MIL's health.

The plan was to do the trip then sell the boat and buy a motor home to tour the country. She was "on board" with all that.

Then, a couple of years ago she said she didn't really want to be on the boat that long.

So at this point my life long dream is a bit up in the air. She hasn't permanently nixed the idea of the cruise but she's not 100% in favor of it.

NorCal, Good luck with your future plans.

 

Life is short. As a camper service tech I know that an RV has huge maintenance issues beginning with the roof and slide outs. Boats are not maintenance free either as we all know. Pick one thing and try it for a couple years. Make memories and try something else. Nothing is forever as my wife and I are finding out quickly. Good luck and have Fun!

 

Perhaps rent an RV as a trial. Plan a trip that goes through bigger cities with substantial traffic. That might satisfy the curiosity and recognize RV life isn't so great.

 

Locally we know of a harbor master that plans on cruising the intercostal water ways which is to take two years to complete. Sounds exciting but might be a tuff way of life. There is an entire community out there to support you on this. Check it out and good luck!

 

NorCal,
If you have the budget, get the RV. Respect her dream as much as your dream. You had the boat, her turn. Give it a few years, then feel good about getting your dream boat.

Besides, have an open mind. I have a travel trailer in addition to my 280. I absolutely love boating, however, camping in the Smokey Mountains is also wonderful.

There is a wonderful RV resort about 20 miles from your house called Reunion Lake. Amazing place including adults-only (alcohol allowed) huge hot tub, heated lazy river, grill, swim up bar, and on and on. A breather from the boat life could give you time to evaluate the local area and shop for a new boat.

I live about 40 miles from you, by the way.

 

Thanks for the response d-dub. Getting an RV is not her “dream”....it’s just something she all-or-a-sudden decided. I went to my first boat show in Seattle at the age of 25 in 1975. I walked on board a 48 foot Tollycraft and stated, “ I am going to have a boat like this some day and just cruise.” I know that not everything in life works out. I know about that RV park in Robert as I checked it out for my brother last year when he came through with his fifth wheel. If you’re so close how come you never invited me to meet up?

Thanks to all of you for your responses. Money and my age (70) all play a factor in this as well. We have the money to buy a nice used express cruiser, or rv, but not really the money for slip fees. I have room at the house for a fifth wheel. If I did the RV thing for a couple of years I feel I may be too old to handle all that goes with large boat ownership.

There are so many facets to this situation and it is a challenge but I know it will get worked out.

 

I count my self lucky I guess, we did the RV thing all over Nor Cal before we got into bigger boat boating. Its always tough when interests diverge though. I guess the best thing is give it a whirl, in the end it will be cheaper and most certainly more fun than a divorce.
Carpe Diem

 

I’m retired and I’m a boater who would love to have a diesel pusher RV for the off season. There’s no way my wife would go for it so I may have to put that idea on hold for now.

 

Our last boat was totaled in a storm and we were having trouble finding a good, used express cruiser. My wife and I discussed getting a new travel trailer instead but both agreed that the RV life is not for us. I guess I'm lucky. We ended up buying a smaller boat than we wanted that was in very good shape until we can find a good, used express cruiser.

My wife's mother lives with us and that's also part of the equation. The way I look at it, if you moved to be near your mother in law you already compromised on your part. Your wife should compromise on the boat vs. RV. If she doesn't want to do the boat thing, have her stay with your mother in law and find someone else to go boating with. It shouldn't be too hard. My dad owns a boat and my mother rarely goes out with him. He usually goes out with buddies of his. The only thing better than owning a boat is having a friend who owns a boat.

 

I am 46. Got burned out on cruising since that is all we did for years growing up and through my 20's. Been everywhere on a boat from Maine to the Caribbean. The two other lifestyles I have been exploring are RV'ing and Lake boating. I've already lived on saltwater, so If I go back to waterfront living I want it to be a lake. And as for RV'ing I currently sleep about 80 nights in an rv with the racing I do with my kid. But it is mostly race tracks. We have been trying to hit rv parks when we can. The whole RV thing is awesome, and a great alternative to boating if you want something new. I am really enjoying seeing the things the interior of our country has to offer, like Rt 66.

I started an RV dealership 6 years ago that is booming. www.BOErv.com Since we do both marine with BOE Marine and RV's we have so many crossover customers and the trend right now is for people to move from boating to RV'ing. The RV parks are incredible. If you like to have some alcohol while you socialize you can do it without worry at an rv park. Boats carry far greater responsibility for the captain. In an RV park you can set up, and enjoy the weekend like everybody else instead of worrying about the boat. RV's have virtually no cost between uses. Maintenance is next to nothing. You can have a top pf the line 5th wheel that will sleep 10 for $70K. A similar boat would be $900k,

When I first got into the marine industry in 1997 things were pretty good. Manufacturers would spend a decent amount of money to entertain dealers. Events were nice. The industry was healthy. The industry now is a shadow of what it was. In contrast, the RV industry is booming. I was at a recent manufacturer event in Elkhart, and the three entertainers for three consecutive nights were Big & Rich, Keith Urban, and Styx. Entertainment on a scale the marine industry has never had, even for one night. Really put into perspective the directions the two industries are going for me.

The cost of boats is out of control. The added technology goes into boats, and really doesn't enhance the enjoyment of the boat, is what driving that. I think the RV industry has been smart to keep rv's simple and affordable.

 

We are enjoying both worlds... We have our Sea Ray 450 and a Monaco Monarch SE w/ 2 slides & 1 & 1/2 bathrooms...
They are pluses and minuses but overall we feel very blessed to be able to enjoy this life.

 

Like some others, we do both RV travel and boating. Personally, I prefer boating over the RV. I find the RVing takes some more planning and the touring isn't nearly as relaxing but we don't use the RV to sit under a palm tree for months at a time. It has been our "see the USA" vehicle. We've visited something like 15 national parks and countless other scenic areas in in the past couple years. That travel was a nice change of pace but as I said, for me, boating is the preferred activity. In the end, it's all just personal preference.

 

So many of my boating family are leaving the activity because their spouses have lost interest. Generally speaking there's a component of boating that appeals far more to men than women. My wife has been boating with me for 30 years and has definitely lost a lot of interest over that time. It's especially true for us lake boaters who can only do so much before it gets very repetitive. If I told her I was selling the boat today she wouldn't mind a bit.

We recently had our first granddaughter and another one on the way. I'm VERY sure her participation is going to plummet even more, which is a huge bummer because I really enjoy her company. But I can't blame her. She only has so much time on this earth and deserves to pursue her happiness as well. Doesn't mean I like it but I have to say I've found being around that little kid way more fun than I ever expected. This also means that my dream of living in a condo on the ocean and a diesel express cruiser parked out back is pretty well dead.

So now my choices are to move the boat closer to the house and make it my hangout where I can go spend the day there and not the whole weekend, or do what I've been doing and cultivating other interests that

We'll be retiring in a few years and our plans are to buy an RV and see the country for a few years and see whether we like it or not. I think the key there is to buy a lightly used motor-home and be in a position to sell it without losing a fortune if it doesn't appeal to us. At least we'll have it out of our system by then.

 

We recently had our first granddaughter and another one on the way.

This is my 5 year old grandson and 2 year old grand daughter - They LOVE the boat - she is usually the first one to jump in. That little pink life vest was used on all three of my daughters and my grandson before her! Susan loves being on the boat with the kids and grandkids!!

Well - I can't upload the iPhone video because its a .MOV extension. I'm sure somebody here knows how to do it...

edit - converted to MP4 and still can't do it...

 

My father has been boating for 60 years and is finally throwing in the towel after spending the last 20 years building his dream boat, a 62' transatlantic capable steel trawler. My parents were able to spend a few winters in the Bahamas and Florida on it but some health issues have halted their long range cruising plans. That coupled with the constant upkeep that our boats require has become too much stress for something that's supposed to be relaxing.

They have also decided to give RV'ing a try and have an LTV on order with delivery scheduled for later this year. Both my parents have new found excitement and are really looking forward to hitting the road to see the sites and visit old friends. They even bought up a Jeep wrangler yesterday to tow behind the RV.

Like you, my dream is to live on the water with a cruiser at the dock. At this point in my life RV'ing doesn't interest me very much but who knows in 15-20 years. With kids in school and our jobs we really couldn't take the time off required to do it now, which is why weekend boating is perfect for us for the near future.

I'd suggest renting an RV for a short trip to see if either of you enjoy it.

BTW - if anyone is looking for an amazing 62' steel trawler, let me know!

 

Thanks for the replies guys. There are so many variables at play here in my situation. I guess the major one is age....or better said, age difference. My wife is 10 years younger than me. I'll be 70 this year and she, 60. I'm semi-retired and work less than one week a month. My wife is still fully employed and makes a good living. However, she would like to retire and thinks 2022 would be a good time but, health insurance is a big issue and she is a Type-1 diabetic and needs really good health insurance.

If we wait for her to retire at 65 I will then be 75. I'm in pretty good shape and health but I see areas where I am slowing down and It makes me wonder if I would be physically capable of handling and maintaining a 35'-40' boat. I have been looking at used 5th wheel trailers. As I said earlier I have an F-250 diesel truck that will easily tow anything I am looking at. For what we are looking to spend on a used trailer we could buy a nice used express in the mid 30 foot range. A trailer I could keep here at the house but a boat will need a slip and that means additional funds. Also, a trailer has no engines and transmissions that need maintenance.

Nothing gives me peace like being on the water. Sitting on the shore has never been my style so taking an RV to a shore someplace may not do it for me. I guess this is just part of the aging process but I don't have to like it. I did tell my wife this past weekend that if she really wants to retire we could sell the house, buy a boat and live on it and cruise a few years. She sadly declined as she doesn't want to leave her Mom.

I really appreciate the input. It really helps and I know this will get figured out. I may just have to face reality....I hate when that happens.
Shawn

 

She sadly declined as she doesn't want to leave her Mom.

Shawn,

After reading your words.....I believe this is at the heart of the matter. Your wife's recent suggestions, changes in directions and reluctance to drive 50 miles, reluctance to cruise or rv with you may stem from a higher sense of obligation to her mom. I could be wrong but what you describe I have seen before. If this is the catalyst, discretionary activities that don't include her mom no longer have the priority they once had. I'm guessing that her Mom is in her late 80s which can be a heart wrenching time for a son or a daughter. I went through it with my mom and dad and you just put your dreams on hold for a while.

There are ways to mitigate it but that comes down to the relationship that you have with her mother. At 70 you should be enjoying your life and making sure you get to your dreams as well.

God bless both of you.

 

Look for a place on the water with a Mother In Law suite or a house you can easily add it to. I guarantee you it will change the dynamics for dream #1 (house on the water) and set the stage for dream #2 (big boat in the back yard).

 

You know, don't take this the wrong way, but she seems to be a bit selfish when it comes to your feelings and what you want. Everything you have said, had you sacrificing, not any on the other side.

 

Put it on YouTube and paste the link

Thanks!

 

Answer: Buy my 5th wheel. 2014 Sandpiper. 45' long. We haven't used it in 2 years.

 

Now that's a great idea however.... That is too big for my truck. So then I would need an F-350 dooly. Probably not the best ide for me. I could buy a nice boat for the price of an F-350....used.

 

I feel like I should just stay out of this....It's far too personal to offer any real suggestions, but I have a few questions.

Have you had a heart felt discussion with your wife about the importance of this to you? A lot of guys just presume they understand, but don't articulate it fully....Esp. if you tell he it would be a temp plan for just a few years. Then sell it and think about the RV'ing.

I had the same thought as @PlayDate re the mother-in-law suite, etc...That's the direction I would pursue... I actually stopped by an estate sale today by mistake. I thought the home was for sale, but it was already sold. It was clearly a situation where the last parent had passed and the children were left dealing with the house and stuff....If she deals with this now and you do the in-law suite, you will be ahead of the game...

Good luck in any event...I will say I know the RV craze is going strong. I remember as soon as fuel prices started going up, it also halted the industry...