Run to the sun!?!?

Talk to your boss and see what he thinks. If you are that close and have a family type relationship he will understand and be happy with your final decision either way.
So you are alive Perry..............:smt017
 
Hey Shaun,

I have to respectfully disagree with the above statements. It sounds to me like you have just started the investigation process of this possible relocation. I would not show my hand too soon as this may not turn out favorable for you. I would continue your research, make a visit or two and if and when you decide to move, then approach your boss.

If you throw it out there now, sort of shooting from the hip, you may undermine his faith in you moving forward and start him on a search for "Plan B". Then if you stay you end up SOL. I'm giving you this advice as a BUSINESS OWNER. I have had a few employees leave the restaurant (that I co-own with my brother) over the years for better opportunities. As sad as we were to see them go we were nothing but supportive of their new endevours. Had they come to me with "I may be leaving sometime" I would have still been disappointed and probably started the search for their replacement. If they eneded up staying I probably would question to myself whether or not it was a ploy to improve their pay and or status. I don't think I would have felt the same after that.

So, if you definitely decide to leave, then approach your boss and help him with the transition and thank him for the opportunity. Un til then, mums the word. Just my 2 cents.
 
Hey Shaun,

I have to respectfully disagree with the above statements. It sounds to me like you have just started the investigation process of this possible relocation. I would not show my hand too soon as this may not turn out favorable for you. I would continue your research, make a visit or two and if and when you decide to move, then approach your boss.

If you throw it out there now, sort of shooting from the hip, you may undermine his faith in you moving forward and start him on a search for "Plan B". Then if you stay you end up SOL. I'm giving you this advice as a BUSINESS OWNER. I have had a few employees leave the restaurant (that I co-own with my brother) over the years for better opportunities. As sad as we were to see them go we were nothing but supportive of their new endevours. Had they come to me with "I may be leaving sometime" I would have still been disappointed and probably started the search for their replacement. If they eneded up staying I probably would question to myself whether or not it was a ploy to improve their pay and or status. I don't think I would have felt the same after that.

So, if you definitely decide to leave, then approach your boss and help him with the transition and thank him for the opportunity. Un til then, mums the word. Just my 2 cents.

Todd, I appreciate your view. This has kind of been along the same lines as how I've felt. Couple things that complicate this. One, although on this forum it looks like this is sudden, this move is something I've seriously dreamt about for years. I also believe that we are at the quite serious point in the process. Number 2 and probably more important, because we are all like family, they know our life and schedule pretty well and know we have no vacation plans coming up. I feel like in order to move forward with this we need to go south pretty soon to look at some housing, neighborhoods and jobs. I'm not a liar so I don't know how to explain these trips without coming clean with our thoughts. That just adds to the complexity a bit...


Shaun
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Btw, I can't begin to tell you all how much your comments, both of encouragement and caution have meant and how much they've helped. I don't discuss stuff on here with heather very often, but have read most of your comments to her. Thanks so much and keep these thoughts coming. Because I've not discussed this with anyone you all are my voices of reason and guidance. Thanks again to all!!


Shaun
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Interesting story that ties a little with what everyone has said here....I have a dockmate that has lived in Mississippi for several years, that is in advertising, and is originally from Michigan. He recently decided to relocate to Florida (Ft. Myers area) to not only open a new branch for his company, but also to better enjoy his boating hobby, and to get a jump on his possible retirement location. They are loving it, having bought a house on a canal with a waterfront lot. As soon as his new boat dock is complete, he will be coming back to Mississippi to pick up his 30' cruiser (non Sea Ray); probably later this month. His high school age son wanted to find a job at a local marina....something he enjoyed doing here in Mississippi. A short job search revealed that all the marina jobs; pumping gas and general maintenance, were held by retirees....big surprise! One guy told him that if he wanted a job in a marina, he needed to keep an eye on the obituaries. When some old guy dies, it opens up a job.

I know, a long story......but if I had a transferrable skillset, and could get to South Florida, I'd be there. I think every experience described here is accurate, but the lifestyle as a resident is much different than that of a tourist. Boating is a bit more expensive, not only because it's a year round obligation to maintenance, but also because saltwater is more corrosive and insurance is higher.

Knowing only what you've said, with your career situation, I would be there on vacation now, scoping out the job market.

Thanks for listening,

Don
 
One of my questions has not yet been addressed and that is regarding my current boat. My initial gut instinct was I'd have to sell it here and then buy a boat down there. However, I'm not convinced about that yet. Although its a "classic", I have done SO much to her with upgrades the last few years and am very happy with her right now. I know what her quirks are, maintenance, etc. and really am wondering about moving her. I would tow down so wouldn't have to pay a mover. I would assume it would be smart to convert to a closed cooling system going to salt water? (Frank??). Other than the couple grand for the cooling I think with the lack out drives she would be a good boat there. Is it crazy to move a boat of this age that far or does the value of my upgrades and knowing what I have add enough value to make sense taking her along?


Shaun
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From the last 9 months of experience in boat shopping for a classic down here in FL (looking for a 89-91 390) if your happy with your boat now and its in good shape bring it down here. I've found that many classic boats I look at down here are beat - and every owner thinks theirs is still pristine. Where I look at boat ads in NJ, NY, MI that look 15 years newer for the same vintage. I've chalked it up to boats down here being used 365 days a year vs pulled/stored/worked on in winter months up north. Wife and I are to the point we're considering buying remote and shipping.
 
Todd, I appreciate your view. This has kind of been along the same lines as how I've felt. Couple things that complicate this. One, although on this forum it looks like this is sudden, this move is something I've seriously dreamt about for years. I also believe that we are at the quite serious point in the process. Number 2 and probably more important, because we are all like family, they know our life and schedule pretty well and know we have no vacation plans coming up. I feel like in order to move forward with this we need to go south pretty soon to look at some housing, neighborhoods and jobs. I'm not a liar so I don't know how to explain these trips without coming clean with our thoughts. That just adds to the complexity a bit...


Shaun
Sent from my iPhone

Shaun,

Fair enough. I can understand not wanting to lie to the guy, especially since you guys have a close relationship. I certainly wouldn't advocate deceit. It sounds like you have a plan in motion. I just would hate for you to throw it out there, come look at housing etc seriously, then decide the timing isn't right or whatever and stay. I am certain the boss will always wonder if he can count on you staying or will you be looking to bail next winter. With that seed of doubt planted he may have to hedge his bet elswhere ultimately opening your door to Florida due to his change of heart.
Either way, I really wish you the best. This is really an exciting life changing endevour you have begun to undertake.
 
Do any of you currently boat or know anyone who boats in the Palm Beach/Jupiter area??


Shaun
Sent from my iPhone
 
From the last 9 months of experience in boat shopping for a classic down here in FL (looking for a 89-91 390) if your happy with your boat now and its in good shape bring it down here. I've found that many classic boats I look at down here are beat - and every owner thinks theirs is still pristine. Where I look at boat ads in NJ, NY, MI that look 15 years newer for the same vintage. I've chalked it up to boats down here being used 365 days a year vs pulled/stored/worked on in winter months up north. Wife and I are to the point we're considering buying remote and shipping.

Not to hijack, but there's 2 of these for sale on the same dock here in Jackson, MS....PM me if I can help. I'll go get a phone number for you.

Don
 
Shaun, I think there is no real answer since every circumstance is unique. My wife and I like to plan travel to areas we potentially can live in retirement. Warm weather, golf and great boating are all mandatory. California is a tough place to plan retirement due to the cost of living, F'ing taxes and political issues. Several of our friends live in Nevada and commute to their boats. Northern Florida is an area that would interest us but we haven't had the chance yet to spend time there but it will come soon. I would consider moving to a new area even while I am actively working in my career since as long as there are building being built in the area.

As far as your relationship with your boss is concerned, I agree that at least mentioning that your family has been considering the move is a stand-up thing to do. He may have great information to share, reasons you are not aware of for you to stay or may even support your decision and help you. I see no need to hide your intentions and you are the only one with a feel for their reaction. I highly doubt your position there would be compromised by sharing your dreams with them.
 
Humph,
Sometimes as much as I like an employee or am sensitive to their issues I have to weigh out the good of me & my business against their situation. If its going to cause me to lose sleep or worry that it may have a negative effect on my business plans or income, then I am considering the changes needed to improve my frame of mind and business future. I am not saying that is the case here by any means. If Shaun is more friend than employee then It should have little effect. And, if he is definitely relocating I encourage honest and open communication as early as possible. I recall Shaun saying that this fellow is planning on selling the business to Shaun , or something to that effect, as he moves toward retirement. Now if Shaun shares his possible relocation, without anything firm in place, I don't see the benefit. If Shaun changes his mind his boss may already be researching an alternate retirement plan, say selling out to a chain. If Shaun decides to not relocate for any myriad of reasons (there are many moving parts in play here) he could find himself on the outside looking in.
If this situation is expected to be resolved in a matter of weeks or possibly a month then it's probably no harm no foul. But, if this drags out over months it could have a negative effect only if Shaun chooses to stay. That was my only point. I'm not saying be deceitful, just exercise some discretion on information to be shared.


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Humph,
Sometimes as much as I like an employee or am sensitive to their issues I have to weigh out the good of me & my business against their situation. If its going to cause me to lose sleep or worry that it may have a negative effect on my business plans or income I am considering the changes needed to improve my frame of mind and business future. I am not saying that is the case here by any means. If Shaun is more friend than employee then It should have little effect. And, if he is definitely relocating I encourage honest and open communication as early as possible. I recall Shaun saying that this fellow is planning on selling the business to Shaun , or something to that effect, as he moves toward retirement. Now if Shaun shares his possible relocation, without anything firm in place, I don't see the benefit. If Shaun changes his mind his boss may already be researching an alternate retirement plan, say selling out to a chain. If Shaun decides to not relocate for any myriad of reasons (there are many moving parts in play here) he could find himself on the outside looking in.
If this situation is expected to be resolved in a matter of weeks or possibly a month then it's probably no harm no foul. But, if this drags out over months it could have a negative effect only if Shaun chooses to stay. That was my only point. I'm not saying be deceitful, just exercise some discretion on information to be shared.


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I think this is very prudent advice.......I would follow it carefully for a myriad of reasons.....
 
Shaun you seem to be further along with your decision than some of us possibly first thought, apart from deciding upon the exact area to move to. Can't you take a legitimate "winter break", and after you decide the place you want to be in give your boss, who is also a friend, the picture? I can't see any descent boss/friend not being understanding of your wishes providing you are up front as soon as you know exactly what you are doing and help him over his transition. No doubt he will be disapointed but if you time it right and don't leave him in the lurch he'll surely understand and remain a friend. Good luck:)
 
Shaun you seem to be further along with your decision than some of us possibly first thought, apart from deciding upon the exact area to move to. Can't you take a legitimate "winter break", and after you decide the place you want to be in give your boss, who is also a friend, the picture? I can't see any descent boss/friend not being understanding of your wishes providing you are up front as soon as you know exactly what you are doing and help him over his transition. No doubt he will be disappointed but if you time it right and don't leave him in the lurch he'll surely understand and remain a friend. Good luck:)

Well you are on to something with the further along thing. Little back story that I left out, not necessarily intentionally, but didn't originally want to make you all suffer through my whooole life story. ;) As I have eluded to, before I went back to school and became a licensed funeral director, I was a police officer/firefighter from the time I was 19. (33 now) Again, moving ot FL has been a dream as long as I can remember. Well in 2008 we made the decision to move. We had our house sold, had moving sales, sold all of our snow blowers/plow truck, gloves, hats, everything cold weather. I had made several trips to Ft. Lauderdale interviewing/testing with the Ft. L police dept. I had made it through all of their testing and interviews and had a conditional offer of employment when we were selling everything, BTW. We also had a neighborhood picked out and Heather had a job pretty much locked up at a local hospital. (She also during this time obtained her FL RN license) Well two weeks before our move date I was contacted by the HR dept and told that a handful of Broward county deps just got the word they were getting laid off and due to the fact that they already had FL law enforcement certification they would be getting first crack at the spots so they retracted the offer. Here's where it got hairy. Knowing how bad I wanted to move, we should have not given up. But we did. We panicked when that fell through, freaked out and said we better just stay here. Well reeeally long story short I unexpectedly fell into the funeral business, quickly fell in love with it and enrolled in mort school. During the 3 years of education I was so busy and distracted from full time work and full time school I didn't have time to think about it much. Well I graduated from mort school this past January and through this past year got my national board certification and state licensing done. Now I've got nothing but work and boating...kinda like where I was in 2008. So, although it seems sudden, we were "mentally" already living in FL in 2008 and when we chickened out the dream didn't die, it just got squelched for a while. So for those of you who read this looong post, thanks and now you know the whole story. With that being said, yes we probably are much further along in the thought process than I may have eluded to in the beginning. The only regret I have so far is chickening out in 2008. I really don't THINK that's going to go away on its own...
 
Well you are on to something with the further along thing. Little back story that I left out, not necessarily intentionally, but didn't originally want to make you all suffer through my whooole life story. ;) As I have eluded to, before I went back to school and became a licensed funeral director, I was a police officer/firefighter from the time I was 19. (33 now) Again, moving ot FL has been a dream as long as I can remember. Well in 2008 we made the decision to move. We had our house sold, had moving sales, sold all of our snow blowers/plow truck, gloves, hats, everything cold weather. I had made several trips to Ft. Lauderdale interviewing/testing with the Ft. L police dept. I had made it through all of their testing and interviews and had a conditional offer of employment when we were selling everything, BTW. We also had a neighborhood picked out and Heather had a job pretty much locked up at a local hospital. (She also during this time obtained her FL RN license) Well two weeks before our move date I was contacted by the HR dept and told that a handful of Broward county deps just got the word they were getting laid off and due to the fact that they already had FL law enforcement certification they would be getting first crack at the spots so they retracted the offer. Here's where it got hairy. Knowing how bad I wanted to move, we should have not given up. But we did. We panicked when that fell through, freaked out and said we better just stay here. Well reeeally long story short I unexpectedly fell into the funeral business, quickly fell in love with it and enrolled in mort school. During the 3 years of education I was so busy and distracted from full time work and full time school I didn't have time to think about it much. Well I graduated from mort school this past January and through this past year got my national board certification and state licensing done. Now I've got nothing but work and boating...kinda like where I was in 2008. So, although it seems sudden, we were "mentally" already living in FL in 2008 and when we chickened out the dream didn't die, it just got squelched for a while. So for those of you who read this looong post, thanks and now you know the whole story. With that being said, yes we probably are much further along in the thought process than I may have eluded to in the beginning. The only regret I have so far is chickening out in 2008. I really don't THINK that's going to go away on its own...

Beginning to make more sense now:) At least from 2008 to 2012 you found yourself a career that's always required, especially in FL:) Can't see you having any difficulty getting a new position here or your "Admiral". Sounds as if you belong down here anyway.....just get on with planning it again, but actually do it this time. BTW, IMHO think you had a lucky escape from being a police officer in Ft. Lauderdale area....scary what those guys have to deal with. Everything happens for a reason eh? Good luck!
 
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Beginning to make more sense now:) At least from 2008 to 2012 you found yourself a career that's always required, especially in FL:) Can't see you having any difficulty getting a new position here or your "Admiral". Sounds as if you belong down here anyway.....just get on with planning it again, but actually do it this time. BTW, IMHO think you had a lucky escape from being a police officer in Ft. Lauderdale area....scary what those guys have to deal with. Everything happens for a reason eh? Good luck!

I couldn't agree more. Everything happens for a reason. I am terribly nervous and amazingly excited that this dream has come back to life. I think for me the hardest part is going to be leaving friends and family. I have a couple of very close friends in particular who I have hinted this to and are already laying on guilt trips trying to talk us out of it. I understand they're just trying to be a bit selfish and keep us around, but I am notoriously a people pleaser and hate upsetting people. Those guilt trips for leaving will be my worst enemy though this process...



Shaun
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Shaun,
More important than the friend issue is the family IMHO. How old are your parents? Grandparents?
I never thought about this when I had the opportunity to relocate to Florida, which ultimately never happened.

My sister relocated due to her husbands transfer that he had requested. She had her eyes on getting out of debt and getting the bigger, new house and gave little thought to what she was leaving behind. Since she left both of my grandparents died and she wasn't here to share their last few years on this planet. My mom will probably be joining them in the not too distant future. I cherished the time I spent with them in those years. My sister still is upset that she wasn't here, regardless of how big her house is now.

This is just a little more food for thought.



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Shaun, you gotta make Heather happy 1st... then you come next.. you made your own way and have the will and want for a warmer climate. if that is what you both want then do it. i was told 7 years ago not to buy a boat because im to young/ its to expensive/ its to far/ and the season is to short.. i dont regret one day buying Aftica and you should do what makes you happy... LIFES TO SHORT....

good luck and keep us posted buddy..:thumbsup:
 
Shaun,
More important than the friend issue is the family IMHO. How old are your parents? Grandparents?
I never thought about this when I had the opportunity to relocate to Florida, which ultimately never happened.

My sister relocated due to her husbands transfer that he had requested. She had her eyes on getting out of debt and getting the bigger, new house and gave little thought to what she was leaving behind. Since she left both of my grandparents died and she wasn't here to share their last few years on this planet. My mom will probably be joining them in the not too distant future. I cherished the time I spent with them in those years. My sister still is upset that she wasn't here, regardless of how big her house is now.

This is just a little more food for thought.



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Todd, certainly a good point and again, thanks to you and everyone else for your genuine thought and consideration with all of this. My grandparents are all deceased. My parents are in their early 60's. Mom is on disability due to a severe stroke many years ago. Dad is retiring this April. When we talked about going to FL in 2008 they had said when they retired they would winter in FL IF we were there but they wouldn't wanna go alone. I believe that still stands so they will probably come down at least for a few months during the winter. In laws....you know. ;) I do have a couple siblings and many nieces and nephews I'm very close too and that will be hard to leave. However, I know they will visit occasionally and I believe with my family, and heather with hers that we will probably be home, even if just for a long weekend, probably every couple months. We currently live 30 min from all of our family and see some of them not much more than that now. Although it will "feel" like we're a long ways away, between FaceTime/Skype and frequent visits I think it will be similar to what we have now. But, never really know I guess....


Shaun
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Just a quick update for those who care or are following...I talked to my boss and his wife tonight. They appreciated my honesty and said they would never be able to replace me and won't even try for several months after I leave incase I change my mind and want to come back. They said although they are very disappointed to lose me, they will support me no matter what I decide. It was a very long, and quite honestly emotional conversation, but went well and I feel better getting it off my chest and on the table. Thanks again to everyone who provided input and feedback. So far, so good and a move to FL is certainly in the radar.


Shaun
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