- May 14, 2008
- 3,538
- Boat Info
- 1988 390 EC
- Engines
- 454 Mercruiser Gassers
Is that to go or are you going to take it with you?
Dumbest S!** I ever heard
- Thread starter hack4alivin
- Start date
Away Point
Member
- Apr 24, 2009
- 292
- Boat Info
- 330 Sundancer
- Engines
- Big, Gas Lovin', American V-8's :-)
Funny stuff! :smt038
"It can't be a dead battery. It's brand new!"
"I don't think we should have to pay. I think the government should pay."
Me: Every since your Y2K computer updates, my ATM card no longer works.
Bank Teller: Whose account are you trying to access?
"It can't be a dead battery. It's brand new!"
"I don't think we should have to pay. I think the government should pay."
Me: Every since your Y2K computer updates, my ATM card no longer works.
Bank Teller: Whose account are you trying to access?
Spookeay
New Member
- Oct 27, 2009
- 768
- Boat Info
- HF Radio ICOM 706 Callsign W4HLK,,
The Tow Truck, 1990 F450 7.3D
- Engines
- Twin 305-Cid 228Hp Mercruiser w/Alpha 1s'
Attachments
- Mar 25, 2008
- 5,522
- Boat Info
- 2006 Sea Ray 58 DB
- Engines
- MAN CRM V8-900s, Twin Disc Drives; Onan 21.5 Generator
You predicted 100 - look how quick we are at 50! We'll make 100 easy!
- Oct 12, 2006
- 1,974
- Boat Info
- "On Vacation"
2006 40 Sundancer
Raymarine E125 & HD Radar + Garmin 5208
- Engines
- QSB5.9 380 Cummins
What about the one who suggested to just raise the outdrives on a 46' Sundancer if the water gets too shallow?
- Oct 12, 2006
- 1,974
- Boat Info
- "On Vacation"
2006 40 Sundancer
Raymarine E125 & HD Radar + Garmin 5208
- Engines
- QSB5.9 380 Cummins
or..that people with lots of green balls know what they are talking about...
- Feb 4, 2007
- 7,251
- Boat Info
- 1996 450DA, TNT, Caribe dink w/15hp OB.
- Engines
- 3126 427HP TD transmissions
don't knock the green balls. I made some serious coin selling mine on ebay.
docofthebay
New Member
- Sep 10, 2009
- 461
- Boat Info
- 1985 390 EC
- Engines
- twin 3208TA Cats
Twin disc transmissions
Two emergency room comments:
1: Very common question- "well Doc, is it broken or just fractured?"
2: When I look into kids ears, sometimes for fun I tell the mom to tell me if light comes out the other ear, and not uncommonly, they come over and look into the other ear and say "no, dont see any"
1: Very common question- "well Doc, is it broken or just fractured?"
2: When I look into kids ears, sometimes for fun I tell the mom to tell me if light comes out the other ear, and not uncommonly, they come over and look into the other ear and say "no, dont see any"
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docofthebay
New Member
- Sep 10, 2009
- 461
- Boat Info
- 1985 390 EC
- Engines
- twin 3208TA Cats
Twin disc transmissions
Another funny, in 20+ years of asking cashiers this question, only one has answered it correctly, "Do you accept Hawaiian money here?" All but one said no, they only took american money.
- Oct 3, 2006
- 4,404
- Boat Info
- 280 Sundancer, Westerbeke MPV generator
- Engines
- twin 5.0's w/BIII drives
Turtle did put his green balls on ebay.
Pseudomind
Active Member
- Jul 1, 2008
- 2,122
- Boat Info
- 2011 Hurricane with Magic Tilt Trailer
- Engines
- 115 HP Yamaha Four Stroke
I vote for this as number 1
Wait there's more
Puke..just puke :smt013White House defends year-old stimulus
Cabinet officials fan out across country this week to tout recovery plan
Obama's fellow Democrats were to tout programs putting people back to work under the $787 billion spending bill. Health and Human Services Secretary Kathleen Sebeliuswas touring a medical center in Atlanta; Homeland Security Secretary Janet Napolitano was promoting stimulus projects in Virginia and Texas. In all, senior administration officials are scheduled to visit 35 communities before Friday to counter Republican claims the massive deficit-spending program has failed. Obama plans to surround himself at the White House on Wednesday with people who have jobs because of the stimulus plan, then travel to Colorado and Nevada.
Wait there's more
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Rono007
New Member
:smt024
On the phone with a client yesterday who had a problem backing up his database so he could e-mail it to me and I could take a look at it to solve an issue. I could not verify the path he was backing up to, so I told him to just back it up to C:. He did and it was successful. Then I asked him to attach it to an e-mail and send it to me. He then asked "Why should I do that when you can just get it yourself." I asked "How can I do that, the database backup is on your computer."
He then said...
"Dude...just grab it off the C: drive."
"Huh?"
< wait for it >
"The Universal C: drive ... you know, the one we all share."
After further discussion, he thought since all PC's had a C: drive, that we ALL shared the same C: drive and all had access to this drive from any PC with C: on it.
:wow:
On the phone with a client yesterday who had a problem backing up his database so he could e-mail it to me and I could take a look at it to solve an issue. I could not verify the path he was backing up to, so I told him to just back it up to C:. He did and it was successful. Then I asked him to attach it to an e-mail and send it to me. He then asked "Why should I do that when you can just get it yourself." I asked "How can I do that, the database backup is on your computer."
He then said...
"Dude...just grab it off the C: drive."
"Huh?"
< wait for it >
"The Universal C: drive ... you know, the one we all share."
After further discussion, he thought since all PC's had a C: drive, that we ALL shared the same C: drive and all had access to this drive from any PC with C: on it.
:wow:
I thought some of these would fit in with this thread!
IDIOT SIGHTING
When my husband and I arrived at an automobile dealership to pick up our car, we were told the keys had been locked in it. We went to the service department and found a mechanic working feverishly to unlock the driver side door. As I watched from the passenger side, I instinctively tried the door handle and discovered that it was unlocked. 'Hey,' I announced to the technician, 'it's open!' His reply: 'I know. I already got that side.'
This was at the Ford dealership in Canton, MS
IDIOT SIGHTING:
We had to have the garage door repaired.
The Sears repairman told us that one of our problems was that we did not have a 'large' enough motor on the opener.
I thought for a minute, and said that we had the largest one Sears made at that time, a 1/2 horsepower.
He shook his head and said, 'Lady, you need a 1/4 horsepower.' I responded that 1/2 was larger than 1/4. He said, 'NO, it's not.' Four is larger than two.'
We haven't used Sears repair since.
IDIOT SIGHTING:
My daughter and I went through the McDonald's take-out window and I gave the clerk a $5 bill. Our total was $4.25, so I also handed her a quarter.
She said, 'you gave me too much money.' I said, 'Yes I know, but this way you can just give me a dollar bill back. She sighed and went to get the manager, who asked me to repeat my request. I did so, and he handed me back the quarter, and said 'We're sorry but we could not do that kind of thing.' The clerk then proceeded to give me back $1 and 75 cents in change.
Do not confuse the clerks at McD's.
IDIOT SIGHTING :
I live in a semi rural area. We recently had a new neighbor call the local township administrative office to request the removal of the DEER CROSSING sign on our road. The reason: 'Too many deer are being hit by cars out here! I don't think this is a good place for them to be crossing anymore.'
From Kingman , KS
IDIOT SIGHTING IN FOOD SERVICE:
My daughter went to a local Taco Bell
and ordered a taco. She asked the person behind
the counter for 'minimal lettuce.'
He said he was sorry,
but they only had iceburg lettuce.
-- From Kansas City
IDIOT SIGHTING:
I was at the airport, checking in at the gate when an airport employee asked, 'Has anyone put anything in your baggage without your knowledge?' To which I replied, 'If it was without my knowledge, how would I know?' He smiled knowingly and nodded,
'That's why we ask.'
Happened in Birmingham , Ala.
IDIOT SIGHTING :
At a good-bye luncheon for an old and dear coworker who was leaving the company due to 'downsizing, ' our manager commented cheerfully, 'This is fun. We should do this more often.' Not another word was spoken. We all just looked at each other with that deer-in-the- headlights stare.
This was a lunch at Texas Instruments.
;
IDIOT SIGHTING :
I work with an individual who plugged her power strip back into itself and for the sake of her life, couldn't understand why her system would not turn on.
A deputy with the Dallas County Sheriffs office, no less.
How would you pronounce this child's name?
"Le-a"
Leah?? NO
Lee - A?? NOPE
Lay - a?? NO
Lei?? Guess Again.
This child attends a school in Kansas City, Mo. Her mother is irate because everyone is getting her name wrong.
It's pronounced "Ledasha", When the Mother was asked about the pronunciation of the name, she said, "the dash don't be silent."
SO, if you see something come across your desk like this please remember to pronounce the dash.
If dey axe you why, tell dem de dash don't be silent.
STAY ALERT!
They walk among us .... and they VOTE
IDIOT SIGHTING
When my husband and I arrived at an automobile dealership to pick up our car, we were told the keys had been locked in it. We went to the service department and found a mechanic working feverishly to unlock the driver side door. As I watched from the passenger side, I instinctively tried the door handle and discovered that it was unlocked. 'Hey,' I announced to the technician, 'it's open!' His reply: 'I know. I already got that side.'
This was at the Ford dealership in Canton, MS
IDIOT SIGHTING:
We had to have the garage door repaired.
The Sears repairman told us that one of our problems was that we did not have a 'large' enough motor on the opener.
I thought for a minute, and said that we had the largest one Sears made at that time, a 1/2 horsepower.
He shook his head and said, 'Lady, you need a 1/4 horsepower.' I responded that 1/2 was larger than 1/4. He said, 'NO, it's not.' Four is larger than two.'
We haven't used Sears repair since.
IDIOT SIGHTING:
My daughter and I went through the McDonald's take-out window and I gave the clerk a $5 bill. Our total was $4.25, so I also handed her a quarter.
She said, 'you gave me too much money.' I said, 'Yes I know, but this way you can just give me a dollar bill back. She sighed and went to get the manager, who asked me to repeat my request. I did so, and he handed me back the quarter, and said 'We're sorry but we could not do that kind of thing.' The clerk then proceeded to give me back $1 and 75 cents in change.
Do not confuse the clerks at McD's.
IDIOT SIGHTING :
I live in a semi rural area. We recently had a new neighbor call the local township administrative office to request the removal of the DEER CROSSING sign on our road. The reason: 'Too many deer are being hit by cars out here! I don't think this is a good place for them to be crossing anymore.'
From Kingman , KS
IDIOT SIGHTING IN FOOD SERVICE:
My daughter went to a local Taco Bell
and ordered a taco. She asked the person behind
the counter for 'minimal lettuce.'
He said he was sorry,
but they only had iceburg lettuce.
-- From Kansas City
IDIOT SIGHTING:
I was at the airport, checking in at the gate when an airport employee asked, 'Has anyone put anything in your baggage without your knowledge?' To which I replied, 'If it was without my knowledge, how would I know?' He smiled knowingly and nodded,
'That's why we ask.'
Happened in Birmingham , Ala.
IDIOT SIGHTING :
At a good-bye luncheon for an old and dear coworker who was leaving the company due to 'downsizing, ' our manager commented cheerfully, 'This is fun. We should do this more often.' Not another word was spoken. We all just looked at each other with that deer-in-the- headlights stare.
This was a lunch at Texas Instruments.
;
IDIOT SIGHTING :
I work with an individual who plugged her power strip back into itself and for the sake of her life, couldn't understand why her system would not turn on.
A deputy with the Dallas County Sheriffs office, no less.
How would you pronounce this child's name?
"Le-a"
Leah?? NO
Lee - A?? NOPE
Lay - a?? NO
Lei?? Guess Again.
This child attends a school in Kansas City, Mo. Her mother is irate because everyone is getting her name wrong.
It's pronounced "Ledasha", When the Mother was asked about the pronunciation of the name, she said, "the dash don't be silent."
SO, if you see something come across your desk like this please remember to pronounce the dash.
If dey axe you why, tell dem de dash don't be silent.
STAY ALERT!
They walk among us .... and they VOTE
Rono007
New Member
I have had this happen to me as well with another one of my clients. I can't undestand how they still have life in them at the end of a day.
osd9
New Member
Going back 25 years or so, I was helping a friends wife try to get her 'new' modem working. I don't remember all the details, but I was basically trying to go over with her what she should be checking. When I asked her if she had a way to check the phone cable, she asked "what phone cable"....basically, she had no idea you had to connect the modem to a phone line....she was way ahead of her time....cellular had not been availble to the public yet.....
Cocktail Time
Well-Known Member
- Jul 9, 2007
- 1,208
- Boat Info
- 1998 400 Sundancer, Garmin 840xs GPS, Furuno Radar, B&G GPS pilot etc.
- Engines
- Cat 3116's, Westerbeke 7.6 BTD
I used to work at a resort here on Lake Lanier that has a pretty good size rental boat fleet, about 80 boats from sea-doos to houseboats, all with no requirements to operate them besides a valid credit card....
One day I am down at the dock talking to another manager and a group of about six Japanese tourists complete with orange foam pfd's on are taking a brand new runabout away from the dock. After the driver gets about 10ft away he starts yelling back toward the dock attendant "Where are the brakes!!!!??" and they actually let these guys continue out for the day...
That's got to make this list.
One day I am down at the dock talking to another manager and a group of about six Japanese tourists complete with orange foam pfd's on are taking a brand new runabout away from the dock. After the driver gets about 10ft away he starts yelling back toward the dock attendant "Where are the brakes!!!!??" and they actually let these guys continue out for the day...
That's got to make this list.
Oh crap I missed that! That's not funny:grin:
51. Use truck bed liner paint on the bottom of your hull
52. You should put a hydraulic platform on your 32' boat
52. You should put a hydraulic platform on your 32' boat
35 years ago I was on business in Galveston, Texas with some cohorts. This was the first time any of us had been to the State so we thought we would order some local brew. When the college student waitress came to take our order we said we want a Texas beer since this was our first time in the State. She promptly replied "I sorry we don't have any here all we serve is Lone Star.":smt021